Lament is a profound and essential aspect of faith, often overlooked in a culture that prioritizes joy and positivity. However, the Bible teaches us that there is “a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance”(Ecclesiastes 3:4). Recognizing and embracing lament allows us to deepen our relationship with God and process the brokenness of the world around us.
A Lesson from Inside Out
One of my favorite movies is Inside Out. This Disney+ classic is both hilarious and deeply emotional. In the film, Riley, an 11-year-old Midwestern girl, faces upheaval when her family moves to San Francisco. Her emotions—led by Joy—try to guide her through this challenging season. But as life becomes more stressful, Sadness begins to play a more prominent role.
Joy, determined to keep Riley happy, tries to suppress Sadness—placing her in a circle, distracting her, and doing everything possible to avoid sorrow. Yet, over time, Joy learns that Sadness is not something to be avoided but embraced, as it plays an essential role in healing and growth.
This mirrors how many of us try to live: striving to remain joyful, to spread positivity, and to avoid sadness at all costs. But just as Joy discovered, sadness has a God-ordained purpose in our lives.
The Biblical Perspective on Lament
Ecclesiastes reminds us that life is made up of seasons:
“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4).
We don’t have to “fake it until we make it” or pretend everything is okay. God gives us permission to feel sadness, grief, and disappointment.
Lament in the Psalms
During the COVID-19 pandemic, I found myself drawn to the book of Psalms, specifically the Psalms of lament. These Psalms—making up about one-third of the entire book—are prayers expressing sorrow, grief, and even frustration. They provide a framework for laying our troubles before God and seeking His help.
To lament is not to show a lack of faith. On the contrary, lament demonstrates a vibrant and engaged faith. As Paul Miller writes in A Praying Life:
“We think laments are disrespectful. God says the opposite. Lamenting shows you are engaged with God in a vibrant, living faith. We live in a deeply broken world. If the pieces of our world are not breaking your heart and you are not in God’s face about them, then … you’ve thrown in the towel.”
In refusing to lament, we risk becoming quietly cynical, shutting ourselves off from honest communication with God. But Scripture gives us permission—and countless examples—of how to bring our deepest struggles to the Lord.
The Pattern of Lament
Laments in the Psalms follow a distinct pattern:
- Complaint
- Cry
- Confidence
- Celebration
An Example: Psalm 13
Complaint
“How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?”
Cry
“Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest my enemy say, ‘I have prevailed over him,’ lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.”
Confidence
“But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.”
Celebration
“I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me.”
Why Lament Matters
Lament is not merely venting our frustrations; it is an act of faith. When we lament, we:
- Acknowledge our brokenness: We admit the pain, grief, and disappointment that weigh on our hearts.
- Depend on God: We cry out to the One who has the power to heal and restore.
- Grow in trust: As we bring our complaints and cries to God, we also reaffirm our confidence in His steadfast love.
- Celebrate His faithfulness: Through lament, we move from sorrow to worship, recognizing that God is working even in our pain.
Practical Steps for Lament
- Identify what’s breaking your heart: What burdens, fears, or disappointments are you carrying?
- Be honest with God: Lay your complaints and cries before Him, knowing He cares deeply for you.
- Reaffirm your trust: Remind yourself of God’s faithfulness in the past.
- Celebrate His goodness: Praise Him for His promises and His ability to bring beauty from ashes.
Conclusion: Embrace the Power of Lament
God is not afraid of your honesty. He wants to hear the cries of your soul and meet you in your pain. Don’t suppress your sadness or pretend everything is okay. Instead, follow the biblical pattern of lament: Complain to God, Cry out to God, Put your Confidence in God, and Celebrate His faithfulness.
Let lament be a tool that draws you closer to Him, strengthens your faith, and allows His healing to transform your sorrow into joy.
